Thursday, May 21, 2015

Rocky Roads and Lemonade


I underwent a colonoscopy yesterday and I feel lousy. I have no desire to eat or drink. I slept and slept and slept and still just want to sleep, 24 hours later. My head is athrob in a vise-like pain across my forehead. My spiritual peace is not in balance, either. My heart feels uncertain about my love life. Unfortunately, my sad financial picture plays into this… but it shouldn’t. I have murmuring thoughts of coming out of retirement to be independent once more. I am not always happy at home with Ron. I am the one to blame. He is just who he is. He is earnest, authentic and loyal but my lifestyle expectations clash with his. Beggars can’t be choosers, so I go along with.  My wish is to be independently living and still have adventures with Ron. Oh, I don’t know but yes I do. My weakness gets me into these unhappy relationships. I’m at a low point, physically and spiritually and it will pass. This stretch of road is rocky but it will surely even out. It always does, and I will always know that I can make lemonade from the lemons in my life.

No comments:

Post a Comment